Heart of Beckett

What a day! Not bad, just interesting…

So, as you may (or may not) know, Leah works on every Saturday and Sunday now from 1:00pm-1:00am. After all the chaos from yesterday, she was having second thoughts heading into work today, but as a mini spoiler alert, she did end up going into work.

As we walked from the parking garage to Beckett’s room, I asked Leah if she thinks he stopped doing the arrhythmias sometime last night. She wouldn’t guess, so I said….”I think he stopped.” My decision was based on the fact that I thought a lot of it may be because he was still in some pain from the cath, and I knew they were willing and ready to give Beckett some pain meds last night if his “fussiness” continued. She agreed, and so that is how we approached his room this morning. We found out that they did end up giving him some morphine last night, but half-doses. Apparently (and not surprisingly), the half-doses hardly “touched him”. As the Cardiologist put it today, “that was probably a spit of morphine for him” (assume we all understood his level of tolerance by now to pain meds….unfortunately). Anyways, he was still doing the arrhythmias when we got to his room…bummer…it was quite discouraging. In fact, his heart rate was crazy…and weird, for a while this morning. We asked if they would get Cardiology because of how bizarre it was…and because of how long it has been going now. They went to get ’em, and they showed up a few minutes later. It was a whole team of them, and the lead Cardiologist in a long and round-about way basically said that he is fine and they aren’t too worried about it. Ironically, as soon as they got there, he was as-calm-as-can-be and was just cooing and showing-off. Though he was still doing the arrhythmias, they weren’t nearly as crazy as we had seen just a few minutes before they arrived. We laughed about the irony, but it was kinda frustrating at the same time. Leah decided to leave for work, right after Beckett flashed her a big smile. It was great timing. However, he then immediately began to moan and groan, so I began to sooth him while she said her “see-ya soon”s. We are bummed she cannot be with us during father’s day tomorrow, but she is doing what we need right now for the family, and I cherish, love and respect her so much for that. I know its bothering her that she won’t be with us, but I truly pray she won’t feel an once of guilt….because it’s unnecessary and not warranted. Furthermore, Beckett only continued to cry and cry and cry. I went to pick him up, but we noticed that he blew through his diaper. So, he not only needed to get that changed (in a timely manner), but to also clean both he and his bed up. The nurse and I did that as fast as we could (she did a lot of it, and I tried to help), but then I picked him up to calm him down. At this point, he is literally out-of-control. He was breathing crazy fast, he was kinda delirious, and was just catching his breather to only try to cry harder. I finally got him calm, and looked up at his monitor to noticed that he literally cried his arrhythmias away. To this hour, they’ve been completely gone….which is AWESOME! Its a shame it had to happen like that, but I’m just glad they’re gone…it was gettin’ kinda nerve racking (no matter what Cardiology was saying…we couldn’t help but to be nervous about it).

Now, on to a really cute story. I don’t mean to compare Beckett to a dog…but have you ever seen those youtube videos of dogs talking and saying things like “I love you”, “hello”, “I want my momma”? Well, it may have just been a “sound”, but shortly after I got Beckett to calm down this morning, he was just staring into my eyes and I leaned in and said, “I love you, Beckett” and I swear he said, “I love you” in a squeaky little baby voice. To verify that I am not going crazy, our nurse was in the room at the same time with her back towards us and spun around immediately with her eyes wide as we both said, “Did you hear that?!” He totally said “I love you”. It was said so “clearly”, that I’m tempted to document this as his first words. Again, I’m not sure if he really knew what he was doing…but either way, the “noise” that came out of his mouth was the noise/words “I love you”. How cool is that?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXo3NFqkaRM

Beckett has been pretty fussy today once he gets tired. I literally pretty much held him ALL day today (which is not a complaint). I tried to put him back in his crib a few times to only fail and wake him in the process. However, I was able to calm him, and we would then play for about 20-30 minutes until he’d start rubbing his eyes (which is his “tell sign” that he is getting tired. You might as well tap a timer, cause he’s T-Minus a few minutes away from breaking down). Sooo, this would involve me picking him back up and holding him, cuddling him, or sitting down with him. Though this (after all day long) killed my arms, back and even tailbone…I’d do it all again in a heartbeat (no pun intended), and plan on it tomorrow! 😉 I do feel he is pulling out of his goofy behavior from the cath (…from these past few days). He had many more situations today that seemed more like him, soooo…that was quite promising.

Thanks everyone for the prayers, concern and support. We feel it. We love it. And am truly humbled by it. It appears we have a long way to go, but the fact that it’s been nearly 6 months and we still have such an amazing following is extremely encouraging and humbling all at the same time. Oh, and something Leah pointed out…Beckett’s first surgery was January 2nd…exactly 6 months later he will be having his second (on July 2nd)…kinda crazy, huh?

….goodnight

#GoBeckett
#ODAAT