Last night was not quite as good as the night before. In fact, it was really exhausting. BUT, I guess Leah and I would have to agree that it wasn’t nearly as bad as a few nights ago. I can’t stress enough how much we do understand that bringing a baby home is stressful in general, but when you are told that your baby should not cry due to the amount of stress it can put on their freshly operated-on heart (in which only half of it is actually functioning), it can pile on the stress when your baby is screaming bloodcurdling cries and cannot be consoled. Neither Leah nor I mind the “annoyance” of it (yeah, we’d rather be sleeping), it’s just scary to think your son could literally be wearing himself out………….not a pleasant thought.
Beckett has had some good moments today. It’s just that unfortunately those moments almost always end with him working himself up way too much to the point that he refluxes, and then it’s “game over”. He’ll start crying sooooo hard, and you can can’t calm him down. I think that’s one of the things that bothers me the most. He use to respond really well to me trying to console him…but I’ve been pretty much useless lately when it comes to that. Sooo, we hold him, rock him, sway him…really anything we can think of….and the extra sad (and like I’ve said before….scary) thing is, he usually stops crying once he’s sooo tired out; it’s not a good thing.
On another note, my parents just left today…they were a huge help. My Dad pretty much painted our entire bathroom for us. Though that was certainly not necessary, it is surprising how much a little paint can add to a room. It looks great! Thanks Dad! And my mother just helped with anything and everything. Leah and I are truly blessed.
Moreover, as I type, Leah’s sisters and mother are pre-drawing all of Beckett’s meds for us. That is a HUGE help. I wish we could draw them up for an entire month, but due to their shelf-life (and some need to be refrigerated), we can only predraw a few days at a time (but that’s better than drawing them each time he needs meds….that would be all the more stressful and very time consuming).
So, that’s about it. We are blessed. We are stressed. We are sleep deprived. And so very thankful. Please continue to pray for rest, patience, and continual healing.